NBA Finals

Two Minutes on the NBA Finals, let's see how we fare:

2 Minutes by No,MoneyDown:

This one is a really tough call, I've gone back and forth a lot b/t Celts and lakers. I went on the whole "Kobe will NOT be denied" premise (I'll try not to make anymore rape jokes). I mean he's really in that mode, you're gonna have to shoot him to keep him from winning that ring. But the Celts have a lot of guys, there's just one Kobe. It hinges on one thing: If Rondo has one more series of brilliance (and if his back can hold up) then the Celts win it, and I say he does, so that's what I'm going with, Celts in 7.

2 Minutes by HighTimeforCrime:

This should be a helluva series, and not just because it's the finals and it ought to be. Both lineups are stacked top to bottom (ok, not you Derek Fisher) and there are thirsty veterans on both sides. Garnett v. Gasol is basically a draw, and I think Ray Ray and Pierce switch off guarding Kobe and do a reasonably good job on him. My ex-factor in this series? Kendrick Perkins: big, nasty. If Andrew Bynum's knee continues to be troublesome, Perkins will take advantage of him all day and night. Celtics in 7.

2 Minutes byDoNoUhOh:

I'm gonna do this two minutes the right way. On that note, I don't like either team. But I really hate Kobe so I'm rooting for Rajon Rondo, who I have always thought was badass, and the Celtics. Man, Rajon Rondo. Crazy. Just two seasons ago announcers kept saying "if Rajon Rondo can just be serviceable he'd be good enough but he isn't" claiming he was the achilles heel of the 2008 Celtics. Look at him now and you think maybe I should look back and see what we were missing back then.

The Seven Player Trade Between the Wizards and the Mavericks

On February 13 the Washington Wizards and Dallas Mavericks completed the first trade of the trade deadline season. The Mavs got Brendan Todd Haywood, Caron Butler and DeShawn Stevenson. The Wizards got Drew Gooden, Josh Howard, Quinton Ross and James Singleton. These two teams are in very different places with the Mavs trying to push themselves over the top to compete in the West and the Wiz trying to start a painful rebuilding process.

2 minutes on the 7-player Wizards-Mavericks deal by HighTimeForCrime

That's it. The end of an era. Ironically, my first post in over a year comes the day after this blog's namesake is traded from the team. I wish him well. He wasted 3 years of his prime on a team that could never take it to the next level. If we were looking for salary cap space, we've got it. We're thinking about the future now, but it just hurts because we have officially moved on. Trying time to be a bullets fan, but it's always about the journey anyway.

2 Minutes on the wizards trade by Money Down:

I was not even aware of this trade and looking it up, it seems very convoluted and it is difficult for me to make a sound judgement on it. If it is based towards rebuilding then it's good. The Wizards seem kinda fucked. Although I don't understand trading Caron, he is our best player, if it's not Jamison. I'm going to have to see what the others say. Haywood never really lived up to his potential, he started to but I'm not sure if he sustained that, I wouldn't be surprised if he didn't. Did we shop Gilbert? Can you trade a player that is currently suspended? I'm sure someone would want him (nice, shootin' Tex).

2 minutes by DoNoUhOh:

The end of an era. A glorious era by the dissappointing standards of the Washingtong Wizards in my lifetime. Our star is suspended indefinitely for breaking gun laws and simultaneously killing our ability to rebuild. Our rock, and the namesake of this blog, is now in another uniform. I'm happy for him. I think he will do well on the Mavs and I'm glad he has a chance to win. I think this will push his game to a new level. I'm happy for my boy Brendan Todd as well. I actually think he is the key to the trade. He can guard big men and randomly score. And he can rebound and block. He's an asset. A, dare I say, underrated asset. Thank you Etan Thomas and your pulled out dreadlocks for making Brendan Todd a man, a man who will end up crushing the Lakers come playoff time.

Recap of Game 1 of the 2008 NBA Finals

2 minutes on a recap of Game 1 of the 2008 NBA finals
You wait over a month and a half for this series to come. The best vs. the best. But then you realize when it's all over, you only have baseball, golf, and tennis for the summer. And then it makes you sad.

By HighTimeForCrime

at the end of the game, when the minutes were counting down, we all saw who stepped up...no one. seriously, it's like both team was trying to give it away. and you could see that the lakers were resting kobe so he could bust out that superhero shit that he does from time to time.



well not this time. and the teams weren't just missing. they were CLANKING off the rim, many with no offensive players around to get the rebound. I expect the last few minutes of game 2 to be more intense than what we saw at the end of game 1.

By DoNoUhOh

For most of the game I was convinced the fourth quarter would be Kobe’s. That he would do what he is completely capable of doing, especially when he hasn’t been scoring big in the first three quarters. Instead Paul Pierce got hurt. And came back. Those must have been some good drugs they shot into that knee. Or else he went down just to inspire upon his return. Whatever it was it was amazing. Paul Pierce stepped up his game, creating the possibility that it is he and not Kevin Garnett who is the true Celtic, the true champion in hiding. Maybe it will be different when the series goes back to LA but I am beginning to doubt whether Boston will lose at home. By the way can we all agree that Rondo should be getting more minutes, House should be the backup and Sam Cassell should just take over coaching duties from Doc?

2008 NBA Finals

I know we been mostly silent since the untimely demise of our boys for life the Washington Bullets. We was mourning. What can I tell you? True fans we are. True believers. But we have been watching, rooting against Queen James with as much passion as we could muster for such a pathetic pansy, rooting for the man the myth the legend Chris Paul and his alley oop, three pointer or bust offense. Alas the season is coming to a close and before it wanders off into history and memory we just had to take a literal couple minutes to chime in on this blast from the past finals matchup.

2 minutes
by HighTimeForCrime
It's the kobe show. He's 29, coming off his first MVP season, and finally has the chance to make a name for himself outside of the Lakers 2001-2003 championships.

I want to give the Celtics some credit, I really do. They've made it to the finals. However rough the ride may have been, they're here. I just don't think they can do it. Lakers in 6. the only x factor for the Celtics is Paul Pierce.

2 minutes on 2008 NBA Finals
by DoNoUhOh

I gotta say it’s a classic matchup. Not my two teams of choice but what can ya do. I was rootin against Kobe but now I’m glad that the doldrums known as the Spurs won’t be here. I hope it goes seven and I hope its exciting. I hope Kobe misses at the buzzer to end the series. I hope KG finally steps up and becomes the man we all want him to be. I hope Rajon Rondo, my main little man, the only Kentucky player I may end up loving turns into the killer I think he can be. I hope a lot of things though and that doesn’t make them come true. Lakers in six. These Celts just don’t have that championship specialness. And I want the winners of a championship to be true champions if you get what I’m saying and maybe you don’t.

Queen James

I want to get the benefit of every close call. I want to take as many steps as I want when driving to the hoop. I want to snarl and pound my chest when I get yet another bogus continuation call. I want to grimace every time I'm touched. I want everyone to talk about how great my numbers are despite how bad my teammates are. I want everyone to talk about how much better I make my teammates after talking about how bad my teammates are. I want to be Queen James...not that there's anything wrong with that.

2 minutes on Queen James
by TheNobleSavage
Maybe its his horrific underbite. Or the constant nailbiting. Or maybe its his strange little ogre ears. I cannot stand Queen James. His oh so holier than thou face he puts on when he knows he just got a call because he's the "Annointed One" or when he's gotten away with a horribe travel. No Queen James, I AM NOT A Witness.

2 minutes on Queen James
By HighTimeForCrime
Lebron is never as good as 1) he should be and 2) he thinks he is. He is no doubt a freak of nature, but every time he drives to the hoop and slams it in or sinks a three from the outside, you say “yeah, but that’s what’s supposed to happen.”
He’s too wrapped up in being a global icon to be the best ever. He’s trying to make his name synonymous with a globally recognized brand. But he’ll never be as good as Jordan because he’s not concentrating on basketball as much as he should.

2 minutes on Queen James
By DoNoUhOh

I know he’s beating us but I’m honestly not that impressed with him. I can’t really explain it. I see him getting the big numbers. And he was certainly draining shots at will in game 2. But it doesn’t feel right. I don’t like the way he always has to check his mouth to see if its bleeding. Over and over again checking. You only get three quick looks. No blood? Put your hand down. And I didn’t like how mad he got, like he was legitimately angry to near tears when Haywood fouled him. That was not a flagrant two by the way. Queen he is.

What's Wrong With the Wizards

Down 2-0 to Queen James. It hurts. Its our curse.

2 minutes on What’s Wrong With the Wizards
By DoNoUhOh

Before Game 2 I was extremely confident that the Wizards would prevail. We were so clearly the better team. If only we had made a couple of those open threes in the 4^th quarter it would’ve been a near blowout. And then Game 2 happened. Our heads weren’t in it, like we were afraid that we had talked ourselves into trouble. Swagger gone. Toughness gone. Chemistry gone. And I hate to say it but I think Arenas is a big part of the problem. All of a sudden Caron isn’t quite Caron anymore. He’s wondering if he’s still the man and we need him to still be the man. Arenas just needs to be that sparkplug guy and energy spurt guy.

2 minuts on What's Wrong With the Wizards
by TheNobleSavage

It's Caron. But it's Caron because of Gil. Gilbert's return has completely messed with everyone's head. With him on the floor no one knows what role they're supposed to play. Caron, our go to guy, now seems lost and unsure of himself when Gil is out there. And Gil thinks he actually is an assassin who can shoot from anywhere. Totally throwing everyone and everything off, he's become more selfish since the playoffs started.

2 minutes on what’s wrong with the wizards
By HighTimeForCrime
I dunno, it’s just not adding up. Our bench was supposed to be deep, Jamison and Caron were supposed to do what they do, and Gil was gonna be Super sub.
We have no defense. After looking like we should have won game 1, we didn’t even look like a playoff team in game 2. The worst part was, no one had that look that said they were gonna take charge of the team and will us to victory; who’s gonna step up?

Antawn Jamison

Antawn Jamison looks like the nicest human being in the entire world. He also seems to get hit in the face more than anyone I’ve ever seen before.

He’s proven he can put a team on his back, carrying the offensive workload in Golden State. He’s proven he can come off the bench and be the most productive at that role in the league during his 6th Man of the Year campaign with Dallas. And in Washington he‘s the glue guy, the guy that keeps the team together, doing all the little things no one notices.

His name is also a misspelling in the records. His parents actually did mean to call him Antwan but kept it spelled as it was because they felt it was more unique. But then they kept the pronunciation of Antwan. I don’t think you’re allowed to do that Antawn.

Without further ado: Mr. Consistency (since when was that ever a bad thing?) himself, the team MVP of the Washington Wizards for the 2007-2008 season, our two minutes on Antwan Jamison…I mean Antawn Jamison.


2 minutes on Antawn Jamison
By HighTimeForCrime

Some of the voters will get it right this year in the MVP race. Not many, but some. I’m not talking about the winner. I’m not even talking about the top 3. I’m talking about the 5-10 range. That’s where you should find Antawn Jamison.
He kept our team together as best he could, playing with rookies, undeveloped big men, and streaky scorers , but he had the ultra dependable Deshawn Stevenson who is $$.


2 minutes on Antawn Jamison
By DoNoUhOh

I would choose him as the MVP of the Wizards. I think he contributes more wins than either Caron Butler or a healthy Gilbert Arenas. All this despite the fact that he’s the third fiddle on the team. That’s what makes it so perfect. What kind of a player averages 20 and 10 despite the fact that most of the time he gets the ball at the three point line if its within the flow of the offense. Most of his inside game is about quick tips and rebounds with this long arms and fast hands. He doesn’t even jump. Its incredible what he can do and will continue to do because he has found a way to play that does not rely on athleticism but on superior smarts and intangibles.

Dirk Nowitzki

He is the Germanator. He is really tall. He shoots nasty threes. His ankles are freakishly flexible allowing him to sprain his ankle every other week and give his knee a good twist (kind of gross) every once in awhile without ever missing more than a few games. He is the Germanator, Power Forward for the Dallas Mavericks. Super Hero or Super Zero?

2 minutes on Dirk Nowitzki
By HighTimeForCrime
It’s not that I don’t think he’s good. It’s just that I remember the ‘06 NBA Finals when Dirk’s Mavs were up 2-0 on the Heat and ended up dropping 4 straight games to lose the title.
And I just thought he was so unclutch. Like, anytime in those 4 games would’ve been a good time for Dirk to turn it on. But he missed his opportunity. And trading for Kidd while mortgaging the future was not the answer to Dallas’s problems. Their time has passed.

2 minutes on Dirk Nowitzki
By DoNoUhOh

I’m not gonna call Nowitzki a pansy. At least I don’t think I’m going to. I’m pretty conflicted about Dirk. On the one hand he’s got a pretty decent first name. On the other hand he’s the best player on a team that has pulled massive chokejobs on multiple occasions. On the one hand he’s a unique superstar the likes of which we have never truly seen before. On the other hand he frequently looks like he is going to cry and had to accept his MVP trophy after being upset by a number 8 seed.

Gheorghe Muresan

Notable for his extreme height, Gheorghe Muresan was much more than just a tall man. To those close to him he was known for being far more complex than the gregarious giant he was for the public. He would occasionally enter dark moods and frequently kept to himself, preferring being alone to facing the bright glare of the public eye. Here at Drink Your Tough Juice we will not be able to shed any light whatsoever on the complex sides of Gheorghe Muresan, 7'7" former center for the Washington Bullets.

2 minutes on Gheorge Muresan
By HighTimeForCrime
One of the sweetest moments in my life: 4 years ago I was at Joe’s Pizza and Pasta and I was looking outside to someone ducking under the awning. I was like whoa that’s weird, cuz that’s like 7 feet high. Then I realize it’s Gheorge Muresan. When he walked in I asked for his autograph. He gave it to me but I could tell he didn’t really want attention. Whelp, that’s what happens when you’re the tallest player in NBA history.

2 minutes on Gheorghe Muresan
By DoNoUhOh

He is one of those guys I always felt vaguely sorry for. He just always seemed like more of a spectacle than a basketball player. But I don’t give him enough credit. He was legit good for a little while. It was his feet that betrayed him not a lack of talent. Many a huge man has met the same fate. And as for being a spectacle. Maybe he was that too. He got paid though and paid handsomely. Haven’t heard from him in awhile. I hope he’s doing okay. I hope he’s living back home like a king, living off the fruits of his youthful labors.

Reggie Wayne

Reginald DeVincey Wayne. Perhaps his parents foreshadowed his artistry on the field. Perhaps The da Vinci Code had nothing to do with the Holy Grail, rather it was intended as a Metaphor of young Reginald’s life. Isn’t that possible? No.


2 minutes on Reggie Wayne
by HighTimeForCrime
Reggie Wayne is just about hitting his prime as Peyton Manning is hitting his prime. Do you realize what this means?
Remember how impressive Manning and Harrison were when Harrison got the catches in a season record . Well now Manning is better, has just as much time with Wayne as he did with Marvin, and Wayne is arguably as good, if not better, a receiver than Harrison, plus he’ll still have Anthony Gonzalez who is coming into his own to draw attention off him.

2 minutes on Reggie Wayne
By DoNoUhOh
Don’t really know that much about Reggie Wayne. That’s because football players as individuals are a lot less accessible than players in most other sports. The NFL makes a conscious effort to keep most of their players anonymous. Meanwhile, the NBA is a league of individuals. Both the NBA and NFL draw their players largely from the same demographic, lower income African Americans. Could it be that part of the reason the NFL is perceived to be so much healthier than the NBA is because it was better at keeping their young black newly minted athletes away from the larger public?

How The Wizards Will Make The 2008 NBA Finals

Last night I had a dream that whatever I decreed today would happen. Unfortunately I stayed up really late and slept really late and was kinda busy so I never got to make my decree. Damn ye gods. As a plea to whatever sports god that is out there who decides this sort of thing I present the decree that should have and could have been were it not for my irresponsible sleeping habits (in two minutes):

2 minutes on How the Wizards will make the 2008 NBA Finals
by HighTimeForCrime
First off, we’re 2 games behind the Cavs for the 4th seed, and home court advantage in the first round. Like I’ve said, you gotta go get that. I say the Phone Booth turns into a madhouse if we get full court advantage over the Cavs, facing them for a 3rd straight year.
So we’ll take them, right. Lebron still gets 40 in a few games, they win a couple but we ultimately take the series.
Then it’s our boys the Celtics. And they know we got their number.
I say we face the Pistons or 76ers (don’t count them out, no one knows what the fuck they’re doin) in the Eastern Finals, but you can’t bet against the Wiz in the East.

2 minutes on How the Wizards Will Make the 2008 NBA Finals
By DoNoUhOh

The last time we were this healthy we were the best team in basketball. That was over a year ago. Now we’re healthy again with a new and improved bench, thank you injury curse, and a new and improved crazy amazing sixth man, thank you gilbert arenas for truly being about the winning. You know who is having back problems and has a crappy team anyway? Queen James, our first round opponent. You know who we match up with perfectly and beat three times this season? The Celtics, the best team in the East. So we face the Pistons maybe? I’m sorry but they are not what they once were way back in the day when they actually won something and didn’t just swagger like the

Brendan Haywood

Here at Drink Your Tough Juice we refer to him as emmy-award winning Brendan Todd Haywood or just Brendan Todd. This is because he is on our team, he is our hometown guy, only we know that his middle name is Todd. How can you not use a middle name like Todd? We won't find the answer here in two minutes but that won't stop us from talking about our boy Brendan Todd Haywood, Master Center of the Washington Bullets:

2 minutes on Brendan Todd Haywood
by HighTimeForCrime
Brendan Todd is the 2nd best center in the Eastern conference, right behind Dwight Howard. His numbers may look modest, averaging around 11 points and 7 rebounds per game. But there are distinct changes in Brendan this year.
He’s finally toughened up on defense. He defends the rim, he positions himself better to get rebounds, he is quick to the perimeter on defense, something quite underrated for a 7-footer to do, he’s increased his free throw percentage dramatically, and he finally brings the kind of aggression to the table that is necessary to intimidate on the inside.

2 minutes on Brendan Todd Haywood
By DoNoUhOh

In the immortal words of Joe Rogan “He’s not a pussy”. At least not anymore. Ever since he ripped out Etan Thomas’ dreadlocks Brendan Todd has become a man. I guess that’s what beating up a teammate can do for you. Especially if that teammate is a poet with a heart problem. Now Brendan Todd is one of the locker room glue guys, a straight man in a locker room full of goofballs. Most importantly though he’s the second best center in the Least and when he exerts himself he is a potential power.

Ernie Grunfeld

Around here we simply call him "Ernie". He's like a good neighbor. State Farm is there.

2 minutes on Ernie Grunfeld
by HighTimeForCrime
You’re crazy if you can’t appreciate the job that Grunfeld has done in D.C. He’s brought in 3 all-stars (which included pulling off the most unlikely trade of the decade ‘till the Pau Gasol deal…hmm also involving Kwame Brown), wisely knew when to not re-sign Larry Hughes even though everyone wanted him to, and has drafted and signed a bench that now has almost a season’s worth experience. Things are looking good right now going into the playoffs. They gotta push for home court advantage vs. the Cavs.

2 minutes on Ernie Grunfeld
by DoNoUhOh

It just occurred to me that I don’t know what Ernie Grunfeld looks like. I picture him as a Stan Van Gundy look a like. I don’t know if this is based on any reality but Ernie Grunfeld should look like Stan Van Gundy. The other interesting thing about Ernie is that he is dangerously close to being one of those guys I just trust even if I disagree with what they’re doing. Did I disagree with not keeping Larry Hughes? Yes. Did I disagree with letting Jared Jeffries go? Yes. Great moves. I trust him to be smarter than me and everyone else. Plus he got us our namesake, Tough Juice, in exchange for Kwame Brown.

2007-08 NBA MVP Race

This has been a good season in the NBA. Ignoring the Leastern Conference, where our beloved Washington Bullets fight the good fight, the Wild West has been the best its ever been. I feel like I could go Stephen A. Smith over this except that I hate Stephen A. Smith and would never ever emulate him in any way if it could at all be helped. Stephen A. Smith is not our 2007-2008 NBA MVP. 2 minutes on who is:

2 minutes on 2007-2008 NBA MVP race
by HighTimeForCrime

My top 3, in order: Garnett, Paul, Kobe.
Garnett changed the entire culture of the Celtics. He restored glory to the NBA’s most revered franchise. He’s tough, he’s intense, he’s a team player, he just wants to win. Plus he’s scary as shit, no one’s gonna fuck with him or do him wrong. He’s this millennium’s Bill Russell, a coach on the court.
Paul gets my second place vote because this team would be nothing without him, as was proven when he went down last year. Yes, they’ve got great weapons (West, Chandler, Peja), but he’s the guy that makes it all happen.

2 minutes on 2007-08 NBA MVP Race
By DoNoUhOh

Everyone has narrowed down the race to Kobe Bryant versus Queen James with a little bit of Chris Paul on the side. Kobe is considered the best all around player on a top level team. Queen James has the most talent and is carrying a mediocre team, similar to Kobe the last few years when he hasn’t won. Then there’s Chris Paul. His team needs him the most. His team has a great shot at winning the West. Plus I hate the selfish Kobe who is finally happy now that his team made one of the most lopsided trades in NBA history. Turns out Kobe was wrong the whole time and the Lakers were getting him help after all. Bitch. I’d say Chris Paul gets my vote but Stephen Jackson is my true MVP hero, crazy motherfucker that he is.

Detlef Schrempf

Young Detlef was well known for his flat top haircut and his whiteness. The truth is he should have been known for looking like a wimpy Drago. And his three point shooting and general euro big manness. Meaning he was a bit of a pansy but highly skilled. Of course if all of the above weren't quite true would anyone remember? Here's the two minutes:

2 minutes on Detlef Shrempf
by HightimeForCrime
Isn’t it kinda weird to think that just a shade over a decade ago the Sonics were in the finals. Payton and Kemp were nasty. Shawn Kemp then gained about 100 pounds and fathered several children. Oh reign man, you silly bastard.

2 minutes on Detlef Schrempf

by DoNoUhOh

What an awesome European dude. At least I think he was European. I’m not really sure. I don’t know much about him other than that he was white and badass. And that he was unbelievable in NBA Live 96 or 97 or sometime back in the day of the Sonics not sucking. Those were the days before the evils of Clay Bennet. What is happening in Seattle right now is a travesty and that’s that.

Etan Thomas

A two minute ode to Brendan Todd Haywood's best friend on the Wizards, an award winning poet, an award winning player, and one hell of a good on air time filler EEEEEEEEEETAAAAAAAANNNNNNNN THOOOOOOOOMMMMMMAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!! (that's the only introduction he's getting like that this year):

He’s a poet. That’s what every announcer will tell you as he’s knocking people around on the inside. He’s a poet. He’s a published poet. He cares about the world and even interacts with it. And now he’s an open heart surgery survivor and possible come backer. Now he’s a health miracle and a poet. And this will be mentioned forever. He’s also got dreadlocks. And he’s black. And he looks like a poet and a miracle, the mystic to make us feel better. This is not mentioned so much but sometimes it is. But none of this lets me get around the fact that he’s a mediocre player with an awful contract.

2 minutes on Etan Thomas
After having all of his dreads ripped out in practice by Brendan Haywood (the REAL reason for his lengthy absence this year), Etan has taken time off to do the things he’s always wanted.

Why Is Our Blog Called Drink Your Tough Juice

We each have two minutes to explain why our blog is called Drink Your Tough Juice (in our own words):

2 minutes on why this blog is called “drink your tough juice”
Caron is the fucking man. No one else is named tough juice. He’s fucking hard core. And yet, there’s a sensitive side to Caron.

Why is our blog called Drink Your Tough Juice (in your own words)?

Now we can totally come at this from a couple different directions. For one Tough Juice undoubtedly refers to Caron Butler the biggest Badass in the NBA. He might as well change his name to Samuel L. Jackson. That’s how badass he is. In this interpretation the act of drinking your tough juice is a metaphor for being badass. So basically it means be Badass like Caron Butler and Samuel L Jackson.
But why did we choose this bizarre name? Well I guess it seemed like a good idea at the time. And that’s as good as it gets.

Andray Blatche

Here's our two minutes on Andray Blatche, the up and coming high school second rounder for the Washington Wizards:

2 minutes on andray blatche
Andray is really coming on as advertised. The welfare-man’s version of Kevin Garnett, Blache is slowly learning to dominate in aspects of his game.
His ability to block/change shots is among the best in the league. If he played every minute of every game, he’d block about 4 a game. He’s learning to control his body better and score in bunches now.

Andray Blatche is a homeless man’s Kevin Garnett. Well, a homeless Kevin Garnett without all the scary intensity that guarantees his place in the MVP discussion. The homeless Kevin Garnett can block shots, sometimes play great defense, sometimes score a lot, sometimes rebound well and sometimes get arrested for soliciting a prostitute. Blatche isn’t the brightest crayon in the box and there are rumors of horribly mismanaged money incidents but I think he has a future. If he does mature into the true homeless man’s Garnett he could be an important player.

Roger Mason Jr

Here's our two minutes on Roger Mason Jr of the Washington Wizards:

Roger Mason Jr is the lone Wahoo in the NBA. He knows he must succeed for the pride of his University. And so he does. He has turned into a gifted scorer and hardworker on defense. When he is forced to play long minutes he consistently comes up big. I often think of fans for the other team going “Who the fuck is THAT guy?!” when he starts and scores 30 on an array of long 3’s and slashes to the basket. I think we need to seriously entertain the idea that he plays better the longer his minutes and that perhaps he should get a starting chance on occasion.

2minutes on Roger Mason Jr.

ROG DRAINS ANOTHER 3!
Is it me or does Roger Mason Jr just kind of decide from time to tome that he wants to turn it on. And he wants to drill 3 or 4 or 5 or 6 threes in a game. Ya know. Cuz he can.

Injury problems we've had this year have actually really solidified our bench in terms of playing experience. Our bench used to be our weakest aspect. Who remembers when the big 3 was Arenas, Jamison and Hughes, our bench was terrible.

Gilbert Arenas' Impending Return

Two minutes on Gilbert Arenas' impending return to the Washington Bullets greatest of all NBA franchises:

Gilbert Arenas is a superstar. I think people are starting to forget how incredible he is when he is healthy. He can do what he wants, when he wants and all in the clutch, except for those pesky free throws against Queen James. That being said I think we should cap his minutes if he returns. Keep him under 20 minutes a game. Use him as a spark plug sixth man to jumpstart a sagging offense. Maybe stick him in there at the end of games where he thrives. All he really wants is to live up to his own legend that he created in his own mind. As long as he gets that last shot he should be happy.

2 minutes on gilbert arenas’s impending return
I think gil would be an incredible addition to the team. Obviously. He is a rare talent in this league. He can drive, shoot, pass when he wants to. Mos tof all, he’s that guy that you want with the ball in the waning seconds of the game. That guy that when he’s dribbling the ball up the court with 7 seconds, the opposing team’s fans are going “fuuuuuuck”.
He is the hibachi man. He fries chicken and shrimp in every city he goes.