The Ravens just re-signed Derrick Mason to a 2 year contract. Here's a sample of ol' reliable:
-1000 yards in 8 of the 10 last years
-Yet, in 5 of those 8 years he didn't eclipse 1100 yards, and in 2 more he didn't eclipse 1200.
-Not once in his 13 year career did he catch 10 TDs.
-Drafted in the 4th round.
2 minutes by HighTimeForCrime
He's just so...unspectacular. He's nowhere near terrible. He's definitely better than good. For all I know he might be a HOFer. But what is it about him that makes him so boring? A 36-year-old going for over a thousand yards with 7 td's as the #1 receiving option? Just doesn't happen much these days. I'm not certain that he won't play into his 40's.
2 minutes by No, MoneyDown
Now here's an NFL transaction that it is really difficult to get excited about. We're' really looking at a player who personifies the under-appreciated that don't do anything but come in and do their job like they're supposed to. OK, maybe I'm selling Mason a bit short, he was pretty explosive in his prime, but now, frankly I think he's on the right team. The Ravens can muster up a little bit of offense now and then, but they won't do anything to excite you (read: Derrick Mason). The dude must be 37 or something now, right? He seems pretty gutsy, I'm unsure of his HOF credentials but I'd hate to see another deserving guy not get in just because he lacks eye-popping statistics.
2 minutes by DoNoUhOh
Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn. This topic made me quote Gone With the Wind.
Showing posts with label DoNoUhOh. Show all posts
Showing posts with label DoNoUhOh. Show all posts
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
Sunday, June 8, 2008
Recap of Game 1 of the 2008 NBA Finals
2 minutes on a recap of Game 1 of the 2008 NBA finals
You wait over a month and a half for this series to come. The best vs. the best. But then you realize when it's all over, you only have baseball, golf, and tennis for the summer. And then it makes you sad.
By HighTimeForCrime
at the end of the game, when the minutes were counting down, we all saw who stepped up...no one. seriously, it's like both team was trying to give it away. and you could see that the lakers were resting kobe so he could bust out that superhero shit that he does from time to time.
well not this time. and the teams weren't just missing. they were CLANKING off the rim, many with no offensive players around to get the rebound. I expect the last few minutes of game 2 to be more intense than what we saw at the end of game 1.
By DoNoUhOh
For most of the game I was convinced the fourth quarter would be Kobe’s. That he would do what he is completely capable of doing, especially when he hasn’t been scoring big in the first three quarters. Instead Paul Pierce got hurt. And came back. Those must have been some good drugs they shot into that knee. Or else he went down just to inspire upon his return. Whatever it was it was amazing. Paul Pierce stepped up his game, creating the possibility that it is he and not Kevin Garnett who is the true Celtic, the true champion in hiding. Maybe it will be different when the series goes back to LA but I am beginning to doubt whether Boston will lose at home. By the way can we all agree that Rondo should be getting more minutes, House should be the backup and Sam Cassell should just take over coaching duties from Doc?
You wait over a month and a half for this series to come. The best vs. the best. But then you realize when it's all over, you only have baseball, golf, and tennis for the summer. And then it makes you sad.
By HighTimeForCrime
at the end of the game, when the minutes were counting down, we all saw who stepped up...no one. seriously, it's like both team was trying to give it away. and you could see that the lakers were resting kobe so he could bust out that superhero shit that he does from time to time.
well not this time. and the teams weren't just missing. they were CLANKING off the rim, many with no offensive players around to get the rebound. I expect the last few minutes of game 2 to be more intense than what we saw at the end of game 1.
By DoNoUhOh
For most of the game I was convinced the fourth quarter would be Kobe’s. That he would do what he is completely capable of doing, especially when he hasn’t been scoring big in the first three quarters. Instead Paul Pierce got hurt. And came back. Those must have been some good drugs they shot into that knee. Or else he went down just to inspire upon his return. Whatever it was it was amazing. Paul Pierce stepped up his game, creating the possibility that it is he and not Kevin Garnett who is the true Celtic, the true champion in hiding. Maybe it will be different when the series goes back to LA but I am beginning to doubt whether Boston will lose at home. By the way can we all agree that Rondo should be getting more minutes, House should be the backup and Sam Cassell should just take over coaching duties from Doc?
Wednesday, June 4, 2008
2008 NBA Finals
I know we been mostly silent since the untimely demise of our boys for life the Washington Bullets. We was mourning. What can I tell you? True fans we are. True believers. But we have been watching, rooting against Queen James with as much passion as we could muster for such a pathetic pansy, rooting for the man the myth the legend Chris Paul and his alley oop, three pointer or bust offense. Alas the season is coming to a close and before it wanders off into history and memory we just had to take a literal couple minutes to chime in on this blast from the past finals matchup.
2 minutes
by HighTimeForCrime
It's the kobe show. He's 29, coming off his first MVP season, and finally has the chance to make a name for himself outside of the Lakers 2001-2003 championships.
I want to give the Celtics some credit, I really do. They've made it to the finals. However rough the ride may have been, they're here. I just don't think they can do it. Lakers in 6. the only x factor for the Celtics is Paul Pierce.
2 minutes on 2008 NBA Finals
by DoNoUhOh
I gotta say it’s a classic matchup. Not my two teams of choice but what can ya do. I was rootin againstKobe Kobe Kentucky
2 minutes
by HighTimeForCrime
It's the kobe show. He's 29, coming off his first MVP season, and finally has the chance to make a name for himself outside of the Lakers 2001-2003 championships.
I want to give the Celtics some credit, I really do. They've made it to the finals. However rough the ride may have been, they're here. I just don't think they can do it. Lakers in 6. the only x factor for the Celtics is Paul Pierce.
2 minutes on 2008 NBA Finals
by DoNoUhOh
I gotta say it’s a classic matchup. Not my two teams of choice but what can ya do. I was rootin against
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
Queen James
I want to get the benefit of every close call. I want to take as many steps as I want when driving to the hoop. I want to snarl and pound my chest when I get yet another bogus continuation call. I want to grimace every time I'm touched. I want everyone to talk about how great my numbers are despite how bad my teammates are. I want everyone to talk about how much better I make my teammates after talking about how bad my teammates are. I want to be Queen James...not that there's anything wrong with that.
2 minutes on Queen James
by TheNobleSavage
Maybe its his horrific underbite. Or the constant nailbiting. Or maybe its his strange little ogre ears. I cannot stand Queen James. His oh so holier than thou face he puts on when he knows he just got a call because he's the "Annointed One" or when he's gotten away with a horribe travel. No Queen James, I AM NOT A Witness.
2 minutes on Queen James
By HighTimeForCrime
Lebron is never as good as 1) he should be and 2) he thinks he is. He is no doubt a freak of nature, but every time he drives to the hoop and slams it in or sinks a three from the outside, you say “yeah, but that’s what’s supposed to happen.”
He’s too wrapped up in being a global icon to be the best ever. He’s trying to make his name synonymous with a globally recognized brand. But he’ll never be as good as Jordan because he’s not concentrating on basketball as much as he should.
2 minutes on Queen James
by TheNobleSavage
Maybe its his horrific underbite. Or the constant nailbiting. Or maybe its his strange little ogre ears. I cannot stand Queen James. His oh so holier than thou face he puts on when he knows he just got a call because he's the "Annointed One" or when he's gotten away with a horribe travel. No Queen James, I AM NOT A Witness.
2 minutes on Queen James
By HighTimeForCrime
Lebron is never as good as 1) he should be and 2) he thinks he is. He is no doubt a freak of nature, but every time he drives to the hoop and slams it in or sinks a three from the outside, you say “yeah, but that’s what’s supposed to happen.”
He’s too wrapped up in being a global icon to be the best ever. He’s trying to make his name synonymous with a globally recognized brand. But he’ll never be as good as Jordan because he’s not concentrating on basketball as much as he should.
2 minutes on Queen James
By DoNoUhOh
I know he’s beating us but I’m honestly not that impressed with him. I can’t really explain it. I see him getting the big numbers. And he was certainly draining shots at will in game 2. But it doesn’t feel right. I don’t like the way he always has to check his mouth to see if its bleeding. Over and over again checking. You only get three quick looks. No blood? Put your hand down. And I didn’t like how mad he got, like he was legitimately angry to near tears when Haywood fouled him. That was not a flagrant two by the way. Queen he is.
Monday, April 21, 2008
What's Wrong With the Wizards
Down 2-0 to Queen James. It hurts. Its our curse.
by TheNobleSavage
It's Caron. But it's Caron because of Gil. Gilbert's return has completely messed with everyone's head. With him on the floor no one knows what role they're supposed to play. Caron, our go to guy, now seems lost and unsure of himself when Gil is out there. And Gil thinks he actually is an assassin who can shoot from anywhere. Totally throwing everyone and everything off, he's become more selfish since the playoffs started.
2 minutes on what’s wrong with the wizards
By HighTimeForCrime
I dunno, it’s just not adding up. Our bench was supposed to be deep, Jamison and Caron were supposed to do what they do, and Gil was gonna be Super sub.
We have no defense. After looking like we should have won game 1, we didn’t even look like a playoff team in game 2. The worst part was, no one had that look that said they were gonna take charge of the team and will us to victory; who’s gonna step up?
2 minutes on What’s Wrong With the Wizards
By DoNoUhOh
Before Game 2 I was extremely confident that the Wizards would prevail. We were so clearly the better team. If only we had made a couple of those open threes in the 4th quarter it would’ve been a near blowout. And then Game 2 happened. Our heads weren’t in it, like we were afraid that we had talked ourselves into trouble. Swagger gone. Toughness gone. Chemistry gone. And I hate to say it but I think Arenas is a big part of the problem. All of a sudden Caron isn’t quite Caron anymore. He’s wondering if he’s still the man and we need him to still be the man. Arenas just needs to be that sparkplug guy and energy spurt guy.
2 minuts on What's Wrong With the Wizardsby TheNobleSavage
It's Caron. But it's Caron because of Gil. Gilbert's return has completely messed with everyone's head. With him on the floor no one knows what role they're supposed to play. Caron, our go to guy, now seems lost and unsure of himself when Gil is out there. And Gil thinks he actually is an assassin who can shoot from anywhere. Totally throwing everyone and everything off, he's become more selfish since the playoffs started.
2 minutes on what’s wrong with the wizards
By HighTimeForCrime
I dunno, it’s just not adding up. Our bench was supposed to be deep, Jamison and Caron were supposed to do what they do, and Gil was gonna be Super sub.
We have no defense. After looking like we should have won game 1, we didn’t even look like a playoff team in game 2. The worst part was, no one had that look that said they were gonna take charge of the team and will us to victory; who’s gonna step up?
Thursday, April 17, 2008
Antawn Jamison
Antawn Jamison looks like the nicest human being in the entire world. He also seems to get hit in the face more than anyone I’ve ever seen before.
He’s proven he can put a team on his back, carrying the offensive workload in Golden State. He’s proven he can come off the bench and be the most productive at that role in the league during his 6th Man of the Year campaign with Dallas. And in Washington he‘s the glue guy, the guy that keeps the team together, doing all the little things no one notices.
His name is also a misspelling in the records. His parents actually did mean to call him Antwan but kept it spelled as it was because they felt it was more unique. But then they kept the pronunciation of Antwan. I don’t think you’re allowed to do that Antawn.
Without further ado: Mr. Consistency (since when was that ever a bad thing?) himself, the team MVP of the Washington Wizards for the 2007-2008 season, our two minutes on Antwan Jamison…I mean Antawn Jamison.
2 minutes on Antawn Jamison
By HighTimeForCrime
Some of the voters will get it right this year in the MVP race. Not many, but some. I’m not talking about the winner. I’m not even talking about the top 3. I’m talking about the 5-10 range. That’s where you should find Antawn Jamison.
He kept our team together as best he could, playing with rookies, undeveloped big men, and streaky scorers , but he had the ultra dependable Deshawn Stevenson who is $$.
2 minutes on Antawn Jamison
By DoNoUhOh
I would choose him as the MVP of the Wizards. I think he contributes more wins than either Caron Butler or a healthy Gilbert Arenas. All this despite the fact that he’s the third fiddle on the team. That’s what makes it so perfect. What kind of a player averages 20 and 10 despite the fact that most of the time he gets the ball at the three point line if its within the flow of the offense. Most of his inside game is about quick tips and rebounds with this long arms and fast hands. He doesn’t even jump. Its incredible what he can do and will continue to do because he has found a way to play that does not rely on athleticism but on superior smarts and intangibles.
He’s proven he can put a team on his back, carrying the offensive workload in Golden State. He’s proven he can come off the bench and be the most productive at that role in the league during his 6th Man of the Year campaign with Dallas. And in Washington he‘s the glue guy, the guy that keeps the team together, doing all the little things no one notices.
His name is also a misspelling in the records. His parents actually did mean to call him Antwan but kept it spelled as it was because they felt it was more unique. But then they kept the pronunciation of Antwan. I don’t think you’re allowed to do that Antawn.
Without further ado: Mr. Consistency (since when was that ever a bad thing?) himself, the team MVP of the Washington Wizards for the 2007-2008 season, our two minutes on Antwan Jamison…I mean Antawn Jamison.
2 minutes on Antawn Jamison
By HighTimeForCrime
Some of the voters will get it right this year in the MVP race. Not many, but some. I’m not talking about the winner. I’m not even talking about the top 3. I’m talking about the 5-10 range. That’s where you should find Antawn Jamison.
He kept our team together as best he could, playing with rookies, undeveloped big men, and streaky scorers , but he had the ultra dependable Deshawn Stevenson who is $$.
2 minutes on Antawn Jamison
By DoNoUhOh
I would choose him as the MVP of the Wizards. I think he contributes more wins than either Caron Butler or a healthy Gilbert Arenas. All this despite the fact that he’s the third fiddle on the team. That’s what makes it so perfect. What kind of a player averages 20 and 10 despite the fact that most of the time he gets the ball at the three point line if its within the flow of the offense. Most of his inside game is about quick tips and rebounds with this long arms and fast hands. He doesn’t even jump. Its incredible what he can do and will continue to do because he has found a way to play that does not rely on athleticism but on superior smarts and intangibles.
Deshawn Stevenson
Once upon a time the Washington Wizards had a player by the name of Jared Jefferies who played shooting guard. Once upon a time Wizards fans liked Jared Jefferies despite his offensive limitations because he had good intangibles, hustled and played defense. And then he was replaced by Deshawn Stevenson. A man who actually plays defense. A man who is a wee bit crazy, just right for our other crazy superhero Agent Zero. A man who randomly decided to become a good 3 point shooter in the middle of the season. He is the locksmith.
2 minutes on Deshawn Stevenson
By HighTimeForCrime
Deshawn is finally becoming who Deshawn was meant to be. It just took a little faith by a team, and he would render his marvelous skills night in and night out.
2 minutes on Deshawn Stevenson
By HighTimeForCrime
Deshawn is finally becoming who Deshawn was meant to be. It just took a little faith by a team, and he would render his marvelous skills night in and night out.
2 minutes on Deshawn Stevenson
By DoNoUhOh
Deshawn has finally become what he was supposed to be out of high school. It is as if he (editors note: that was just five two letter words in a row, I’m stunned) suddenly decided to be good. The best, and craziest, part is that his career year is coming in the first year of his new big contract. As in he’s actually rewarding the team by getting better even after they paid him. I love that. It doesn’t happen often enough. Deshawn also has that all important swagger that can get you through a playoff series. You hear that Lebron? You’re overrated.
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
Pacman Jones
Pacman Jones belongs in Dallas. Dallas is a safe haven for criminals, degenerates and stereotypical thuggish athletes. They developed Michael Irvin's drug addiction in Dallas. They imported Tank Johnson's guns. They drafted Quincy Carter's coke problem. They took a flier on TO's psychologically decimated brain. And now they are doing their best to trade for Pacman Jones and his problem with breaking every law he knows about.
2 minutes on Pacman Jones
By HighTimeForCrime
There’s not a chance Pacman can survive in Dallas. Each one of those little dots in the original Pacman game is a strip club in downtown Dallas.
2 minutes on Pacman Jones
By HighTimeForCrime
There’s not a chance Pacman can survive in Dallas. Each one of those little dots in the original Pacman game is a strip club in downtown Dallas.
2 minutes on Pacman Jones
By DoNoUhOh
All the man did was make it rain. Can you really fault him for that? I mean making it rain is probably the most badass thing you can possibly do. And then all hell broke loose and a guy got shot and it turned out that Pacman Jones is a crime spree. And then we learned that he can’t stay out of trouble even when he’s trying. Makes you wonder. Yeah maybe Pacman is unfairly singled out sometimes like when he got pulled over for not having a license. But still come on its ridiculous. How much bad shit are you doing and getting away with if you are getting caught that often.
2008 NFL Draft
That whole scene where super jacked young men perform physical feats and get measured by less jacked old men called the the NFL Combine has already passed. That means its Draft season. Where all predictions are made and all predictions manage to be completely wrong:
By HighTimeForCrime
I don’t think you’re gonna see anyone trade out of the first few spots.
Miami takes OT Jake Long at the top. You pair him with Samson Satele at C and free agent signing G Justin Smiley and ROT Vernon Carey , you’ve actually got a pretty decent line, and it’s being taught by Sparano, Dallas’s O-line coach from last year.
2 minutes on the 2008 NFL Draft
By DoNoUhOh
I’m pretty excited at the prospect of the number 1 pick being someone I’ve met, Chris Long. That’s pretty crazy right? A nice little factoid to toss out at your local cocktail party or wherever it is that people toss out little factoids like I’ve met the number draft pick in the NFL. Unfortunately Other Long will probably go in front of him. So my man Chris will be left as merely a top 3 or top 5 pick. Still a multimillionaire but no longer part of my little factoid repertoire.
2 minutes on the top of the 2008 NFL draftBy HighTimeForCrime
I don’t think you’re gonna see anyone trade out of the first few spots.
Miami takes OT Jake Long at the top. You pair him with Samson Satele at C and free agent signing G Justin Smiley and ROT Vernon Carey , you’ve actually got a pretty decent line, and it’s being taught by Sparano, Dallas’s O-line coach from last year.
Dirk Nowitzki
He is the Germanator. He is really tall. He shoots nasty threes. His ankles are freakishly flexible allowing him to sprain his ankle every other week and give his knee a good twist (kind of gross) every once in awhile without ever missing more than a few games. He is the Germanator, Power Forward for the Dallas Mavericks. Super Hero or Super Zero?
2 minutes on Dirk Nowitzki
By HighTimeForCrime
It’s not that I don’t think he’s good. It’s just that I remember the ‘06 NBA Finals when Dirk’s Mavs were up 2-0 on the Heat and ended up dropping 4 straight games to lose the title.
And I just thought he was so unclutch. Like, anytime in those 4 games would’ve been a good time for Dirk to turn it on. But he missed his opportunity. And trading for Kidd while mortgaging the future was not the answer to Dallas’s problems. Their time has passed.
2 minutes on Dirk Nowitzki
By HighTimeForCrime
It’s not that I don’t think he’s good. It’s just that I remember the ‘06 NBA Finals when Dirk’s Mavs were up 2-0 on the Heat and ended up dropping 4 straight games to lose the title.
And I just thought he was so unclutch. Like, anytime in those 4 games would’ve been a good time for Dirk to turn it on. But he missed his opportunity. And trading for Kidd while mortgaging the future was not the answer to Dallas’s problems. Their time has passed.
2 minutes on Dirk Nowitzki
By DoNoUhOh
I’m not gonna call Nowitzki a pansy. At least I don’t think I’m going to. I’m pretty conflicted about Dirk. On the one hand he’s got a pretty decent first name. On the other hand he’s the best player on a team that has pulled massive chokejobs on multiple occasions. On the one hand he’s a unique superstar the likes of which we have never truly seen before. On the other hand he frequently looks like he is going to cry and had to accept his MVP trophy after being upset by a number 8 seed.
Sunday, April 13, 2008
Gheorghe Muresan
Notable for his extreme height, Gheorghe Muresan was much more than just a tall man. To those close to him he was known for being far more complex than the gregarious giant he was for the public. He would occasionally enter dark moods and frequently kept to himself, preferring being alone to facing the bright glare of the public eye. Here at Drink Your Tough Juice we will not be able to shed any light whatsoever on the complex sides of Gheorghe Muresan, 7'7" former center for the Washington Bullets.
2 minutes on Gheorge Muresan
By HighTimeForCrime
One of the sweetest moments in my life: 4 years ago I was at Joe’s Pizza and Pasta and I was looking outside to someone ducking under the awning. I was like whoa that’s weird, cuz that’s like 7 feet high. Then I realize it’s Gheorge Muresan. When he walked in I asked for his autograph. He gave it to me but I could tell he didn’t really want attention. Whelp, that’s what happens when you’re the tallest player in NBA history.
2 minutes on Gheorge Muresan
By HighTimeForCrime
One of the sweetest moments in my life: 4 years ago I was at Joe’s Pizza and Pasta and I was looking outside to someone ducking under the awning. I was like whoa that’s weird, cuz that’s like 7 feet high. Then I realize it’s Gheorge Muresan. When he walked in I asked for his autograph. He gave it to me but I could tell he didn’t really want attention. Whelp, that’s what happens when you’re the tallest player in NBA history.
2 minutes on Gheorghe Muresan
By DoNoUhOh
He is one of those guys I always felt vaguely sorry for. He just always seemed like more of a spectacle than a basketball player. But I don’t give him enough credit. He was legit good for a little while. It was his feet that betrayed him not a lack of talent. Many a huge man has met the same fate. And as for being a spectacle. Maybe he was that too. He got paid though and paid handsomely. Haven’t heard from him in awhile. I hope he’s doing okay. I hope he’s living back home like a king, living off the fruits of his youthful labors.
Aaron Rodgers
We apologize for our recent absence. It is because HighTimeForCrime had an A Capella concert. But have no fear. We are back. Here to discuss the man behind the man, the myth, the legend, we present our two minutes on Aaron Rodgers:
2 minutes on Aaron Rodgers
By Meast
Rodgers will be nothing to nobody. Its like he won't even be a footnote in Packers history. He will b out of the starting QB job in less than three years. A lot like many Chicago and Washington QBs. Rodgers won't do anyhting next season and the Packers will have a losing season.
2 minutes on Aaron Rodgers
By HighTimeForCrime
Aaron Rodgers was drafted into a kind of shitty circumstance in this league. Brett Favre was a huge dick to him, saying that it wasn’t his responsibility or obligation to mentor Rodgers. Fans will not be very forgiving if Rodgers falters, because they are used to having their golden boy behind center.
I think that has probably taken a toll on him, because the qb’s confidence is way more important than his physical capabilities or understanding of the playbook.
2 minutes on Aaron Rodgers
By DoNoUhOh
Alas he will remain irrelevant. Brett Favre, horribly overrated and selfish, will hold true to character and refuse to leave the spotlight. Yes, that’s right, Brett Favre will return as the Packers QB. Or more precisely he will hover around the team as the season begins. Aaron Rodgers will do his best to lead the team with Favre leaning over his shoulder. The
2 minutes on Aaron Rodgers
By Meast
Rodgers will be nothing to nobody. Its like he won't even be a footnote in Packers history. He will b out of the starting QB job in less than three years. A lot like many Chicago and Washington QBs. Rodgers won't do anyhting next season and the Packers will have a losing season.
2 minutes on Aaron Rodgers
By HighTimeForCrime
Aaron Rodgers was drafted into a kind of shitty circumstance in this league. Brett Favre was a huge dick to him, saying that it wasn’t his responsibility or obligation to mentor Rodgers. Fans will not be very forgiving if Rodgers falters, because they are used to having their golden boy behind center.
I think that has probably taken a toll on him, because the qb’s confidence is way more important than his physical capabilities or understanding of the playbook.
Thursday, April 10, 2008
PEZ
What came first PEZ or the PEZ dispenser? It is as timeless a debate as the chicken and the egg (the egg came first you fools!). Here we have today, in the spirit of being fair and balanced, a debate on this issue. A shockingly schizophrenic two minute take on PEZ:
2 minutes on PEZ
by HighTimeForCrime
What a great fucking candy PEZ is. I dunno, I wasn’t ever really the guy who collected all those PEZ dispensers, I frankly thought the candy was a whole lot more delicious-er. Honestly, why do I need to have a Yosemetie Sam Pez dispenser as well as a Sylvester one? They both do the same damn thing, dispense the sweet deliciousness.
2 minutes on PEZ
by HighTimeForCrime
What a great fucking candy PEZ is. I dunno, I wasn’t ever really the guy who collected all those PEZ dispensers, I frankly thought the candy was a whole lot more delicious-er. Honestly, why do I need to have a Yosemetie Sam Pez dispenser as well as a Sylvester one? They both do the same damn thing, dispense the sweet deliciousness.
2 minutes on Pez
by DoNoUhOh
Pez. Really not that great. It’s the truth. You all know it. Pez dispensers. Incredibly great. How can you not love them? They can be anything. Any random thing you pick up in a knick knack store. Don’t know what it is? It’s a Pez dispenser. For all those Pez you eat. Plus the Pez dispenser played an important role in a very funny episode of Seinfeld. Such a ridiculously useful prop cannot go unrecognized. Still. Pez are not that great. So the purpose of the Pez dispenser is a bit of a mystery which is certainly not entertaining or funny.
How The Wizards Will Make The 2008 NBA Finals
Last night I had a dream that whatever I decreed today would happen. Unfortunately I stayed up really late and slept really late and was kinda busy so I never got to make my decree. Damn ye gods. As a plea to whatever sports god that is out there who decides this sort of thing I present the decree that should have and could have been were it not for my irresponsible sleeping habits (in two minutes):
2 minutes on How the Wizards will make the 2008 NBA Finals
by HighTimeForCrime
First off, we’re 2 games behind the Cavs for the 4th seed, and home court advantage in the first round. Like I’ve said, you gotta go get that. I say the Phone Booth turns into a madhouse if we get full court advantage over the Cavs, facing them for a 3rd straight year.
So we’ll take them, right. Lebron still gets 40 in a few games, they win a couple but we ultimately take the series.
Then it’s our boys the Celtics. And they know we got their number.
I say we face the Pistons or 76ers (don’t count them out, no one knows what the fuck they’re doin) in the Eastern Finals, but you can’t bet against the Wiz in the East.
2 minutes on How the Wizards will make the 2008 NBA Finals
by HighTimeForCrime
First off, we’re 2 games behind the Cavs for the 4th seed, and home court advantage in the first round. Like I’ve said, you gotta go get that. I say the Phone Booth turns into a madhouse if we get full court advantage over the Cavs, facing them for a 3rd straight year.
So we’ll take them, right. Lebron still gets 40 in a few games, they win a couple but we ultimately take the series.
Then it’s our boys the Celtics. And they know we got their number.
I say we face the Pistons or 76ers (don’t count them out, no one knows what the fuck they’re doin) in the Eastern Finals, but you can’t bet against the Wiz in the East.
2 minutes on How the Wizards Will Make the 2008 NBA Finals
By DoNoUhOh
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